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My original blogging…

April 5, 2008

plans for April had included beginning to share the life of my first son, James, and how God brought us through those days. I had all ready written two posts for the series and meant to post the first on April 3rd, James’ 14th birthday.

Obviously back surgery interrupted my plans a bit.  As I laid in the hospital on the 3rd I couldn’t help but think of James.  His birthday is always a surreal event because nothing in the whole day has the least bit of celebration attached to it.  It’s a day of remembering when he was born, and then wondering what he would look like today.

It’s odd to think that I could actually have his photo aged today through technology and get an idea of what he would look like, but I don’t think I’d like that at all.  In my mind he’s timeless as a two and a half year old toddler.  His eyes were always older than the rest of him.  Like he saw into the shortness of his life and grew old from it.

And then I realize that sentiment is the overly dramatic idea of a grieving mom.  James was just James.  He will have to remain as such until God grants me recognition of him in heaven.

I’ll begin posting the series in the next couple of days.

4 Comments leave one →
  1. April 5, 2008 5:59 pm

    My eyes always well with tears when I read about James. The birthdays are surreal, aren’t they. Flooded with memories, but no celebration.

    A better Day is ahead, Elle, a better Day is ahead!

    I look forward to your series.

  2. April 5, 2008 8:27 pm

    I’m looking forward to your series, too, Elle. God bless you this weekend.

  3. April 5, 2008 10:09 pm

    Praise God you do not grieve as those who have no hope. I too look forward to your remembrances, as tender as they may be for you to share.

  4. Jill permalink
    April 6, 2008 2:48 am

    Lisa said it. We do not grieve as those who have no hope, praise Him! I look forward to reading about precious James and hold you in prayer as you remember him for us.

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